Inadequate for the Time I’ve Lived 

As I sit in an empty and silent room I hear nothing but the clock tick after each second. As I start to dial in on the ticking I can’t help but to think about time. I start to feel inadequate. Is what I have done with the time I’ve been dealt good enough? Does it compare to what my peers have done? As I start really thinking about time I’m filled with darkness. I hate the word cancer but now I am viewing time like it is acting as a cancer to my life. I am taken to the quote that was framed in my grandmothers living room that has a start date and end date with a dash in the middle. It highlights how life is represented as the dash in the middle. Why am I idolizing this dash and the time it represents, God is the only thing that should be put on a pedestal like that.

Now I am brought back to the beginning and realize I didn’t start feeling inadequate until I started focusing on the time I have spent and the way people around me have spent theirs. When I start to compare my life to people around me is when the darkness starts to outweigh the light. The truth is time is powerful but I refuse to let the voices inside me begin to judge my time compared to my peers.
My time can only be judged by one person and that is my Father in Heaven. It will be judged on the people I have impacted, the lives I’ve changed and the hearts I’ve touched. When I stand before God I believe he will tell me my time on earth was successful because of the times I put out my hand and heart for the broken not because I owned a house and drove a nice car. When I let my heart think this way time starts to become a beautiful thing.

Don’t let what others are doing with their time bring you down about yours. There is only one person you have to measure up to. So I ask everyone don’t feel inadequate in the image of what you compare to others. That is exactly what the devil wants. Base it on everything you have done that is beautiful to God!

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